Why Couples Fight: A Step-By-Step Guide to Ending the Frustration, Conflict, and Resentment in Your Relationship

Bestselling author and relationship expert, Mira Kirshenbaum examines power dynamics in relationships and teaches couples her three-step method for ending their power struggles and finding their way back to love.How do two well-meaning people who genuinely care about each other end up in a damaged, unsatisfying relationship?Every couple faces conflict and often the root of the problem is how we're not getting our needs met. Initially, we will try to remedy it with reasonable requests--or hints--and a kind tone. But when that fails, we feel disempowered, which leads to sighs, eye rolls, silences, subtle put-downs, insults, and even threats. These are power moves. And while we often engage in power moves unintentionally, the result is the same: our partner feels disempowered and will try to re-empower themselves. Thus the continuous, endlessly destructive dynamic takes hold.Relationship expert Mira Kirshenbaum, bestselling author of Too Good to Leave, Too Bad to Stay, reveals a better way with her three-step method for conflict-free problem solving. By recognizing each partner's power moves, we can instead find mutually satisfying ways to heal our hurts and meet each other's needs.Non-judgmental, compassionate, and wise, this is an indispensable guide to help couples end the negative cycle and get back to the loving understanding that brought them together in the first place.